Schadenfreude

I'm so slow, I make connections at a glacial pace. I was thinking about how I actually enjoy that that woman who had a meltdown about the Respect for Marriage Act. Missouri Republican Congresswoman Vicky Hartzler cried when she talked about how it would affect her to have her prejudices challenged.

Is it wrong for me to enjoy Hartzler's pain? 

I think about Anakin he kills Count Dooku, "it's not the Jedi way." I mean I really believe in being authentic and that pretending to be enlightened isn't the way, but I'm interested in the guilt I have at schadenfreude.  What is that guilt telling me? That getting my way (tolerance and acceptance of the whole spectrum of sexuality) and having someone suffer because they didn't get their way (forcing an inappropriate and ineffective way of being that harms others).

The insight I had today cooking my pasta with mushrooms, nuts and a marinara sauce was that is what I don't like about talk of karma. The schadenfreude of it. Similar to the "fucked around and found out" spirit in the fight for good and less good. 

I have lost 3 friendships in the Trump years, and it's been really hard to have people basically lie to my face about an election, January 6th, and all that. I don't think a political perspective entitles you to be an asshole, like Abbott sending a bus full of immigrants to arrive at Kamala Harris' house on Xmas eve (NY Times). That's a really grimy thing to do and it would only be an ideological perspective that hides the cruelty of it. I don't want to in any way enjoy partisand shots, but I do like what I consider to be the triumph of good over less good. 

I'm working for the alleviation of suffering of all beings through the very difficult discipline of Buddhism. So even when people I don't feel good about, suffer, I'm not as thrilled about that as I could be. (I hear the people in my life laughing at my pathetic attempts, but I still think I want that even if I am so pathetic.)

MSNBC video, that includes nephew Andrew Hartzler putting his aunt in her place. He points out that she's not being silenced, she can't put her "religion" on him. His parents sent him conversion therapy and when in college, he had more conversion therapy. How can you work to change people's desires?