Challenging myself

Latest vegan TEDx talk. Actually it came out in April 2018. I have been a vegetarian on and off in my life since I learned you don't need to eat meat in a nutrition class at the University of Wisconsin. I've been a vegan off and on since my best friend, and my life partner converted. The three main reasons for veganism, for the environment, for health and for ethical reasons are perhaps the best way for me to enact my ethical hopes.

Meanwhile in Burma there's a monk who preaches war: The Venerable W. And he's a Donald Trump fan! The NY Times has a review of the documentary. I didn't know anything about the 969 Movement.

I am really attracted to the ideals of Buddhism. The reality of a Buddhist nation can be different. Living in a Christian country, I dream of living in a Buddhist country.

I believe this is why Pema Chodron beats on the drum "start where you are." We've got to keep our eyes wide open. Where are we really. Let's be honest.

There was a recent article about William James and Josiah Royce. It said that James believed that we know so little about the world that we should be tolerant of others. I thought that was pretty cool. Royce said that loyalties mark out being. I'd like to read more about this. Ever since I read that article, I've been asking myself what am I really loyal to?

It's a bit like the refuge question. What do you take refuge in. Really, not just what I wish I was taking refuge in. When I'm exhausted working through the night, I meditate. It is so hard to meditate in exhaustion and being more mindful of exhaustion can be painful. But I emerge from meditation more mindful and integrated. It is worth it.

When I buy a hamburger on the way to work because I'm hungry and that is a cheap option, I am not being loyal to my vegan ideas. This is a deeply held belief of mine, allegedly, but the reality is that I slip from time to time. "I am not enlightened yet" is a great moral excuse, but I need to challenge myself to ask why. I must not hold the belief too closely.

I believe we will make the most hay by challenging our own lack of integrity. The land mines inside me are what I need to watch out for. The lack of tolerance inside me is what I look out for. The lack of integrity inside me, is what I need to look out for.

I don't mean we can't criticize others and play out this internal battle in the large stage.

I don't know why ethical struggling isn't the main conversation. I think people hide their struggle with living up to their ideals because if others knew their struggles, they would be giving away negative self information.

Never mind that a 10 year old has figured it out about veganism.

Vegan 2017

I don't really believe in new years resolutions, because I'm always taking steps forward (sometimes backwards temporarily) and the end of the calendar year isn't the only time for reflection and aspirations to move towards the Buddha, to close the distance between us. Winter is a good time for reflection.

Anywho, one aspiration for me is to be more and more vegan. I know farmers kill insects and other things when they harvest plants. If you really care about plant suffering, you would only eat plants because meat needs more plants for a little meat. But the people who bring up the plants have feeling arguments aren't really sincere about plant feelings. The goal is to reduce suffering in the world, and going vegan clearly, unequivocally does that.

Going vegan isn't an easy things. There will be things you miss. I will admit in 2016 I made few slips, when my vegan sponsor (Anandi) wasn't around and when there were leftovers from my sons, who are not vegan in the fridge. My daughter will be vegan.

Anandi got an instant pot for the holidays. I'm hoping she will write something about it on her wonderful blog: Under the Influence of Food. I try to fill in some spaces when she's not into blogging with my complementary blog: Under the Influence of Cori. Cori is Anandi by the way, that's her buddhist name.

I'm still struggling to get through Eating Animals because it's so horrific. I'm still struggling to watch Earthlings or Cowspiracy. I did watch Gary Yourofsky. I did watch the year in vegan review.

The preponderance of evidence helps me to make the leap, I at first thought impossible. Cittapala took down the Complete Vegetarian, and a bunch of other excellent essays, but that was also part of it. And it always helps to have friends who go the "whole hog". One of my friends and his girlfriend are very passionate about veganism, and that really helped me see the light.

I was reading The Complete Works of Ajahn Cahn and he was saying just eating rich from the begging rounds once a day is a Dhutanga. In Eat Sleep Sit people dropped out because of nutritional deficiencies that Anandi said could be solved by going from white to brown rice.

I read to get a feeling of sangha, to be with someone. I know reading a lot is often seen as not the way to be a Buddhist. Luckily, I don't have a great memory, so I'm not a know it all.

So we're off to find vegan food at a restaurant now.

My favorite places include Veggie Castle, Panorama of the silence-heart,  and Smile of the Beyond. The latter two are Sri Chinmoy joints. I read Cartwheels in a Sari, and the subtitle is "growing up in a cult". Tamm sees it as a cult. The workers are very nice, and the place doesn't bother me. The first place is a Guyanese place.