another theme...

He writes about his partner, who says, "She added that it has also been a steep learning curve: “I have had forty years to do exactly what I want when I want, to be utterly self-regarding. I have realized how much more I could have used that freedom now that I don’t have it.”"

This is another point about the narrowing of possibilities. I sometimes don't feel the urgency and opportunity my single friends have. They don't know it. How do you know? Have it taken away from you. It's like your health, you don't appreciate it till it's gone. Or most of us don't, it's hard to cultivate gratitude for something you take for granted, though of course not impossible.

While the Buddha left his family, he also had a family. Perhaps that is where I want to follow the Buddha's model.

Now maybe all the life of the Buddha story is parable and myth. I don't know. It's been suggested that we know nothing about the actual historical Buddha. I'm inclined to lean towards the idea that his story in the pali cannon is not pure fiction. So anyway, we must take that into account.