I'm an imperfect western practitioner of 20 plus years, read a million books but did not always display virtue, at times, had some deep experiences on retreat, make no claims, not a teacher, never been perfect.
I don't read posts with the following words in them "attachment", "no self", "nirvana", "no desire", "Reincarnation", or people who trumpet Alan Watts as a great teacher. I hope his books can give some money to his 7 children and their descendants, and can appreciate his wit at times.
The path is about ethics, community, fellowship, study, meditation, devotion. Quibblers are too superficial for me. We think and talk because we have brains but to me Buddhism not a philosophy, it's a religion, and religion is about organizing the world psychologically, with deep and difficult to express feelings of devotion. Zizek seeing the religious as fetishist is offensive, but I'm OK with people who don't have any deep experiences spouting off at the mouth, that seems to be how the internet fills out it's content.
I'm a little wary of people who are from the east and can cite books about 2500 years ago, and the similarities with what became Hinduism and Jainism. That may be true, and a historical understanding is important, but I don't think you're somehow more clear or perceptive if you're from the east, you have to express clarity and perceptions. Westerners are often pretty superficial and underestimate the depth of Buddhism, but again we must treat people based on their actions, what they say.
I have a skeptical mind, when I read about gods, I imagine them as psychological projections and not literally true, but recognize that psychology makes them feel literally true. People have corrected me that the gods of the Buddha's times were not Hindu gods, that wasn't a religion yet. The Buddha was operating in the time before Hinduism I'm not sure how to characterize the gods of those times, but I'm disinclined to say it's literally true because the Buddha was speaking the vernacular of the times. Part of being a Buddhist is understanding contingency. I respect the traditions that see reincarnation as essential Buddhism. As an American fleeing the oppressions of Christianity, the constant proselytizing I'm wary of arbitrary metaphysics to prove I'm part of the tribe, but I somehow do want to be considered a Buddhist, even if it's in my own imperfect western way.
Reincarnation is an idea that can be perverted or exaggerated. I'd rather just stick to conditionality. This being that becomes, imasmim sati idam hoti. If personalities are transferred beyond one life, then it will be evident. If it's a metaphysic of the times, and isn't necessary, that will be proven out by time. Secular Buddhism isn't a sangha but it's possible in another 2500 years it could be considered one. Time will tell. I think it's a cultural belief of those times, and I don't mean any disrespect. I have considered it for my entire life as a Buddhist out of respect. I'm still open to it. I don't think I'm colonizing Buddhism as a white man, but if I inevitably do that, then I guess I have to. That doesn't mean I don't have to be more sensitive and learn things, and listen to others. The idea that stealing eastern gold, and not caring about the people isn't true of me, I do care about everyone, we are interconnected, but I am puny and limited. I have great reverence for the cultures that passed on the tradition even if it doesn't seem so to some. I know Native Americans feel burned and are more reserved now, guard their wisdoms, and that happens in Buddhism some but the translations of the Pali Canon, which I read every day, are the most amazing resources, and I hope I respect these great texts, hold reverence for them. I hope to be forgiven by the context of Christian America to be more empirical, and my efforts and sincerity will be appreciated, but I understand victims like to reverse the script and victimize, I have no special rights beyond just being another human.
I really just need to focus on my practice, but I am sensitive to the circumstances and want to understand the circumstances to support others, if that is even appropriate, and I'll be honest that sometimes I've wished to help and it was unwanted, and even worse, I've given unwanted feedback to others. My zeal and excitement is often misplaced, confused, and not appropriate. Nobody likes being projected on, not seen as a subject. I never really understood Buber's metaphysics, but I really like the idea of strive to treat others as a thou. I have been crap at spiritual friendship, but I still like friends, and live off the memories of past friendships. I make mistakes but I want to keep trying.
I'm not a hermit because you can't be a hermit and read the internet. I love Hanshan's poetry:
238
We hear about the ministers of state
their red and purple ornaments of rank
their limitless wealth and countless honors
their quest for glory their resistance to shame
their courtyards of slaves and stables of horses
their vaults full of silver and gold
but a fool's paradise is brief consolation
for someone who blindly builds his own hell
he suddenly dies and all plans stop
sons and daughters gather to cry
unaware of approaching disaster
what was his headlong hurry
his family is ruined and scattered
without any food to eat
cold and hungry and wretched
and all because of ignorance
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